Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Confusion

You came into my life when i least expected it
And very different from any other guy i had met or was interested in in everyway
We became friends first, the lovers
Only time knows when that line was crossed
From feelings of care to feelings of love
Oh i fought long and hard
I had been through a lot the last year
But you hung in there
And after 4 months, i Finally gave in.
We were dating.

Then things started going south
Sure, we had always had fights
But they were becoming more frequent
And hurt a lot more
You couldn't handle when i did something wrong
I couldn't handle you when you got all mean and angry when i did something wrong
We fought
Almost broke up twice
But i guess back then what held us together was stronger than what pulled us apart.
And so we fought just before i left the country
And made up
Everyday i would talk to you over facebook while i was away
I would call just to hear your voice
Everyone i knew was so suprised because all i could talk about was you
That never happened to me before.

Then i came back
So anxious to see you
So anxious to be with you
But was i in for a suprise
You were....different
Couldn't explain it if it killed me
Just didn't do the things you used to i guess
Less tolerant too.
We fought 2 days after i got back
A fight that tore my heart
We made up kinda, but you decided that we needed to take a break in order for US to work
I was so against it
I knew it was the beginning of the end
And i couldn't understand why a guy that supposedly had so much love for me couldn't handle the simple things that happen in relationships
Or am i wrong? Are we the only couple that fight?
Anyway, after much ado, i agreed to your scheme
We were on a break

But then you kept acting like we were together
And it was confusing me
Cuz in my world, if you are on a break, you are single
Then i started feeling neglected
Work, friends, everything was taking you away from me
And so i broke down and sent you some ugly texts
And the next day, after my ordeal with the police, you tell me that you can't do it anymore
You tell me that you have finally accepted that it won't work
I try to talk sense into you
Why break up over a text?
But you were adamant
I remember the conversation.....

"My gut instinct right now is telling me to just forget about the whole thing and let it go"
"Do that then!"

And so it ended.
Been almost a week
Was fine the day after
And a couple days after that
Then you start sending me mixed signals again
You poke my waist at a meeting
You purposely bump into me at a friend's house
Both gestures i ignored
You sent me text messages to find out what was going on with the police
And to find out how i was doing

Why do you care?
After all, you're the one that said you couldn't do it anymore.
So what's the problem?
Then i decide to ask you how you are doing
And you don't respond
Its getting me annoyed
YOU don't need to check up on me and see how i'm doing
I'm just fine
You don't need to act like you care outta guilt
Thats cool too
But i'm through playing games with you
Its hurting me.

I can't even be friends with you right now
Because i don't trust you
I don't understand how something so good could go so sour so fast
I don't understand how someone that claims to love me the way you do could treat me like this
All over A TEXT MESSAGE