Monday, December 14, 2009

The Breakup

This is the story of I and my ex.

He was the first one i can say i had sex with. He is also the first one i was actually in a relationship the longest with. He is also the one i think i came closest to loving (notice i did not say i loved him).

He also was the one that God got me away from.

We met last fall. The chemistry was ridiculous. After a couple months, in a slightly tipsy state, i agreed to date him (after he had asked me 3 different times and i said no).

Shortly after, i went to nigeria. Missed him a lot. Couldn't wait to get back to him. But then, even before i left, we fought. Often. After i came back, we kept fighting. Over silly stuff. At the back of my mind, i knew that it wasn't going to work. I didn't have the strength to leave though. Then i stopped caring about him altogether. Was strange. Didn't really understand my emotions.

Then came the fateful day. I was driving home from the mall, when my bank called me. A pleasant voice on the other end of the line asked me, "Ma'am, did you recently make a donation to an islamic scholarship?"

I am not muslim y'all.

A series of other questions followed. Before i knew it, i was rushing back to school, to my bank. They had closed. The lady was nice enough to print out for me the last couple transactions.

Over $500 was missing from my account.

I was stunned. I called my ex, and went to go and meet him on campus. Sat down in a conference room and cried. He was distant. Seeing as he wasn't going to be any use to me, i wanted to drop him wherever he wanted to go. Went home, and started thinking of how i would deal with the mess. The bank lady had told me that the bank cannot refund me the stolen money, and I would have to call the merchants and beg for my money back.

No one picked my calls.

I was finally told my some lady working for Proactiv that it seems like some orders were made using my back account info to be delivered to an apartment in my apartment complex.

Armed with this information among other things, i headed to the police station. I sat there for over an hour, alone. The station was empty. An impersonal voice through a speaker on the wall informed me intermittently that an officer will be with me soon. Still had not heard from my boyfriend. Other people called to check up on me. Not one word from him.

The officer finally came. He asked me a couple questions. He seemed rather impatient, to tell the truth. It started to look like he thought i was making up the whole story, for whatever reason. He finally asked me to come outside to his car to make a statement. I asked him why we couldn't do it inside, and he responded like i was retarded and asked me again to step outside. As i was about to write a statement, i realized that the whole thing was futile, and he was probably going to trash my statement. So i decided to decline, and i entered my car. I was tired, hungry, and very frustrated. I called my boyfriend. I asked him why he hadn't even bothered to check up on me.

Then he told me he wanted to break up.

I realized shortly after that i wasn't mad at him for breaking up with me. Truth be told, i knew it wouldn't go anywhere. What i had trouble with was the betrayal.

We were friends before we started going out. What kind of a friend abandons their friend in such a time? I felt that even if he wanted to break up with me, he could have at least waited till the next day. I know i know, silly eh? But oh well... i remember, during the recovery phase, God took me to this passage:

"Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces."

Matthew chapter 7 vs 6.

I think afterward i was a zombie. Oh, i still had fun, still hung out with friends. But when i went to bed at night......its an experience i never want to go through again.

More on my road to redemption coming soon...

Love y'all! :D


Sting said...

What kind of bank do u have? They should refund ur money since those were fraudulent charges.

Nice Anon said...

I know sting! What sort of bank won't want to return your money? Keep your head up!

The- Damsel said...

your bank is stupid. and your relationship sounded much like mine ( well how it WAS) i regret some of the things we did ( although we didnt sleep together) u sound like me after it was over with...if u want to talk about it im here!!

Anonymous said...


Elizabeth Hanakata said...

God is the answer of everything :)
HE's the healer of the hearts ;) seriously~

optimistic mom said...

I like the verse about pearls to pigs.. all too often I or we give our best to those that don't or may never or will never appreciate it.

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김루디 said...

So many fraud stuffs happen in korea too. But i heard that its not the bank's fault,so they are not responsible which is a shame!!!